Brandon Funston should be begging for change.

NFL Skinny: Week 4 Preview

By Brandon Funston, Yahoo! Sports Sep 29, 1:35 am EDT

Tell us all that you know, Eddie Munster.

...We already knew Aaron Rodgers(notes) was big time, but I can’t begin to tell you how impressed I am with how far Jay Cutler(notes) has progressed at his craft in the short time under Mike Martz. Maybe Martz doesn’t deserve all the credit, because the big difference with Cutler is something that is really hard to change overnight. It’s his demeanor. You can tell that the “Matrix” is finally unveiling itself in his mind and he’s now so much more relaxed under fire, and he’s making much smarter decisions because of it. He didn’t put up huge numbers against the Packers, but it was clear enough to me that he now firmly belongs among the elite class of QBs that I felt comfortable moving him into my latest Big Board top 50.

AND, let's take a look at Jay Cutler's stat line from last night's game against the Giants:

8/11, 42 yds (3.8 yds/comp), 0 TD's, 1 INT, 10 Sacks, 1 Concussion, 0 jelly-donuts (he really cannot have them)...

ELITE!
Brandon Funston is a poor man's Eric Karabell, and neither of these guys would finish in the top 7 in a 10 team fantasy football league with 3 women in it. (Just want to point out here that I'm not being sexist; it is a proven scientific fact that women cannot operate draft applets as successfully as men because their breasts get in the way.)
Also: stop making Matrix references. Please?

I did have more of a finger on the Week 3 pulse than the previous week, going 11-5 for my game predictions after a forgettable 8-8 Week 2. I’ll be hard-pressed to repeat the 11-correct mark this week given we’re dealing with two less games this time around. There’s 14 games on the Week 4 docket, so let’s dive in with an early look at how I see them playing out.

OOH, 11-5! That would put you at a heady 30th out of 60 in my office picks pool.

I work for the New York City Ballet.

Also, at the risk of being too nitpicky, is it too much to ask that a professional writer understand the difference between "less" and "fewer"? "Less" is used when comparing uncountable quantity, "fewer" is used when comparing numbered items. Here is an example: Fewer people pay attention to Brandon Funston's columns each week, because, with respect to Fantasy Football, Brandon Funston's columns are less informative than VH1's Pop-up Video.

(Did you know that Jahvid Best was in The Digital Underground?)